Pitfall #1: INSISTING ON A PERFECT WEDDING
There is no such thing as a perfect wedding. . . and if there were, would you really want it? Perfection is probably not your goal. No doubt this is a red-letter day in your life. You want it to be special. You want your family and; friends to celebrate with you and have a good time. However, little unexpected things happen. When you keep things in perspective, these don't have to ruin your day. Of course, you don't want major disruptions or distractions because of poor planning and; preparation. That's why you want to avoid pitfalls #'s 2-5. Do this: On your wedding day, give yourself a good talking to and remind yourself what your wedding day is really all about.
Pitfall #2: POOR WEDDING REHEARSAL EXECUTION
If your wedding rehearsal is an exercise in frustration, you don't have much time to get over it! Likely your wedding is the next day. Do this: You can reduce the chances of problems at the wedding rehearsal in a couple of ways: One, have a professional director if possible. At the least, you need a friend or family member with strong enough personality (without taking over your wedding wishes) to get people moving and to be there for the wedding to remind everyone what to do/when. Two, know before going to your rehearsal exactly how you want your wedding to go. Rehearsals are not a time for working this out, but for practicing what you've already decided. This doesn't mean that you won't see something at your rehearsal that you want to change. But, if you go in with no plan, well-meaning friends & family may take over your wedding.
Pitfall #3: NO BACK-UP PLAN IF YOU HAVE CHILDREN IN YOUR WEDDING: Children are precious in weddings and if you want them in yours, then certainly include them. However, for the sake of the children, have a back-up plan.
Even children who are outgoing have trouble sometimes when they see "all those people." You don't want the children to be embarrassed, frightened, and upset.
Do this: Increasing, couples have children (ring bearers, flower girls) come down the aisle and then immediately go sit with family on the front rows.
This way, they feel included in the wedding and; "get seen" but then are relieved from the pressure of the spotlight.
What if children are hesitant to come down the aisle by themselves? A possibility is to have them walk down with one of the attendants. What if a child won't stand still and; becomes a distraction? Have a family member who will come get the child and; take them to a seat.
Pitfall #4: USING RECORDED WEDDING MUSIC - This may be the most frequent goof-up I see at weddings. Invariably, the person doing the music can't find the on/off button, plays the wrong song at the wrong time, or abruptly ends the bride's processional music with a loud click of the off switch.
Do this: Have live wedding music if possible. It sounds better and; you don't have the problems mentioned above. Or, hire a DJ. I know some that will do the ‘ceremony music only’ for $75 - $100
Recorded wedding songs can work nicely, but if you rehearse anything, make sure you rehearse the music; what songs when, how long they run, and when to fade them out.
Pitfall #5: AN INEXPERIENCED WEDDING CEREMONY OFFICIANT - Perhaps I'm biased here, but I have seen and have heard many horror stories about ministers and other officiants who do a poor job. Calling the couple by the wrong names, leaving out the bridal kiss, speaking too low or too long, are just some of the problems. Weddings are not the easiest things to do. Experience can make a difference.
Do this: Use an experienced wedding minister or officiant! An experienced wedding officiant will know what do when unexpected things happen. Did the best man lose the ring; what to do now?
Perhaps there is someone very special to you as a couple that you want to perform your ceremony even though they don't have much wedding experience. In this case, spend a lot of time with them going over exactly what you want in the ceremony. Make sure any inexperienced officiant is at the rehearsal and go through the ceremony a couple of times.
Brenda M. Owen Experienced Wedding Officiant, Minister - http://WeddingWoman.net
Avoid these 5 pitfalls in planning your wedding and you will decrease your odds of wedding bloopers ruining your wedding and your memories.
About the Author:
Ralph Griggs is a life-long non-denominational minister in Nashville, Tenn.